Forgiveness

God's been taking on a journey through the life of Joseph. I'm learning so much about his character, his righteousness etc. Today though, I want to write about how FORGIVING Joseph was - probably the MOST forgiving man in the Bible (other than Christ)...he was so justified to not forgive, however, he chose forgive....

So, learning from Joseph:

1. Don't tell people what he/she did to you - Gen. 45:1 - Joseph sent out all the people from the room and then told his brothers who he was and what his brothers had done to him. This was a wonderful chance to get some "justice". Instead, he told others to leave the room to tell his offender who he was.

2. Don't allow he/she to fear you. - Gen. 45:4 - when Joseph's brothers feared him most, he asked them to come closer so he could love on them.

3. Don't allow them to feel guilty - Gen. 45:5 - Joseph didn't allow them to grieve over what they had done. He didn't expect an apology. He was free to forgive maybe because he held NO bitterness towards them?

What does God say about forgiveness:
Matthew 6:12
Mark 6:15
Mark 11:26
Ephesians 4:32
Colossians 3:13

4. Let them save face - Gen. 45:8 - Joseph says "it is not you who sent me here, but GOD did." - He gave them a way out and put the whole thing in perspective. When we allow the holy spirit to set us free from bitterness, it allows God to work in us, to use us in a way won't be able to when we hold onto. Let God work it out - give him time to work it out (for Joseph, it was 22 years!)

5. You protect them from their darkest secrets - Gen. 45:9 - Joseph could have trapped the brothers and said "Go back to Dad and tell him what you've done!" - instead, Joseph told them what to tell him. He didn't allow them to expose themselves to their father.

6. How many times do you repent of the same sin? - Gen 50:15-21 - After 17 years of being reunited his brothers still sought forgiveness, and Joseph did not hold a "life sentence on them". He wept, and reminded his brothers that this was God's will.

7. Pray for God to bless them. - Gen. 50: 25 - Joseph made sure that his brothers were taken care of. He spoke God's promise and provision over their lives.

The only way to get full forgiveness is to surrender my heart to God. I'm not to be frantic and make rash decisions, but I can pray for that person, allowing God to work in their heart. He will slowly remove that bitterness, that hurt and remove that constant need to talk about them....

As Christians, we are the ONLY religion that understands what forgiveness is - Muslims do not, Hindu does not, but Christians have the cross. With a surrendered heart, allowing God to do his work in me.

Just as I am without one plea,
But that thy blood was shed for me.
And that thou benst me come to thee
oh Lamb of God I come, I come.

Just as I am and waiting not,
To rid my soul of one dark blot
To thee who's blood can cleanse each spot
Oh Lamb of God I come, I come.

Just as I am though tossed about,
With many a conflict many doubt
Fighting's and fears within without
Oh Lamb of God I come, I come.

Just as I am thou wilt receive
Wilt welcome pardon, cleanse, relieve
Because thy promise I believe
Oh Lamb of God I come, I come.

Judgements

Today was a day of reflection - of looking at what God has done in my life. I spent most of the day (between taking care of 6 kiddos) reading the WORD, soaking in the precious words of my Father.
Psalm 20 was emailed to me this morning:
1 May the LORD answer you in the day of trouble;
May the name of the God of Jacob defend you;
² May He send you help from the sanctuary,
And strengthen you out of Zion;
³ May He remember all your offerings,
And accept your burnt sacrifice. Selah
⁴ May He grant you according to your heart’s desire,
And fulfill all your purpose.
⁵ We will rejoice in your salvation,
And in the name of our God we will set up our banners!
May the LORD fulfill all your petitions.
⁶ Now I know that the LORD saves His anointed;
He will answer him from His holy heaven
With the saving strength of His right hand.
⁷ Some trust in chariots, and some in horses;
But we will remember the name of the LORD our God.
⁸ They have bowed down and fallen;
But we have risen and stand upright.
⁹ Save, LORD!
May the King answer us when we call.

Then I spoke with a trusted friend - an accountability partner if you will - and she spoke such good truth to me.

Here's the situation - someone asked me about something, something from my past...something that I had healed from. I didn't defend myself really, I just said it wasn't so. It didn't hurt at the time - then I realized later (after losing self control later that night) that I was very disturbed by the question. I felt attacked, angry, hurt, betrayed, bitter. I felt horrible, ugly, and like "maybe I haven't changed!" - I cried, I bawled, I grieved and mourned - I was so confused why this could hurt SO bad? I don't know if it was meant to hurt or not, then this precious soul (angel if you will) spoke such a good word to me. Here's what she said:

"Maybe she didn't mean what you thought she meant....maybe she wasn't attacking at all, but MAYBE with the question she asked, it was a question in general to all women, it is a process of her own healing, maybe God is working on her restoration and healing as well, and she wanted to know how you had healed from this."

WOW - she caused me to take a HUGE step back, out of the situation and try to see this situation and person through God's perspective, or just a different perpective. It was interesting, and caused me to look at the situation as not being an attacking one, but one that maybe I just got too defensive, and allowed the ENEMY to destroy something that was meant for good. I want to ask for forgiveness, but I think it's too late. I now pray for that person, that God will bring complete healing to her. That God will completely restore her heart, and that he will also restore mine. I am sad that I allowed the enemy to get me so down with this, and those comments. I am disappointed in myself that I was not stronger. Now, she's gone, out of my life, and I hate it - I miss her and I wish I could have even the little bit back that I once had. I was trying SO hard, but maybe, I HOPE that God will bring restoration to our relationship. I put my hope in him for this relationship in knowing that he has restored SO many others. I pray that his good, pleasing and perfect will is done.
1 Peter 4: 1-6
¹ Therefore, since Christ suffered for us^a]">[a] in the flesh, arm yourselves also with the same mind, for he who has suffered in the flesh has ceased from sin, ² that he no longer should live the rest of his time in the flesh for the lusts of men, but for the will of God. ³ For we have spent^b]">[b] in doing the will of the Gentiles—when we walked in lewdness, lusts, drunkenness, revelries, drinking parties, and abominable idolatries. ⁴ In regard to these, they think it strange that you do not run with them in the same flood of dissipation, speaking evil of you. ⁵ They will give an account to Him who is ready to judge the living and the dead. ⁶ For this reason the gospel was preached also to those who are dead, that they might be judged according to men in the flesh, but live according to God in the spirit. enough of our past lifetime




Selah

My failings...God's victory?

I'm influenced most by people whose lives match their words. Interestingly, for these people, doing what's right is a natural way to honor God. Their influence over me is a by-product of that devotion, and I'm changed by watching the unspoken alignment of their talk and walk.

Oh, my tongue verses my motives......

What a mess I make sometimes. What is it that Paul says in Romans 7:15-20
¹⁵I do not understand what I do. For what I want to do I do not do, but what I hate I do. ¹⁶And if I do what I do not want to do, I agree that the law is good. ¹⁷As it is, it is no longer I myself who do it, but it is sin living in me. ¹⁸I know that nothing good lives in me, that is, in my sinful nature.^c]">[c] For I have the desire to do what is good, but I cannot carry it out. ¹⁹For what I do is not the good I want to do; no, the evil I do not want to do—this I keep on doing. ²⁰Now if I do what I do not want to do, it is no longer I who do it, but it is sin living in me that does it.

I so badly want to live to do what is right. To live daily in the freedom of Christ. Is it the enemy that makes me stumble? Is it my sinful nature? Is it my flesh? Is it just that I'm NOT perfect? I desire so much to do what is right in the eyes of God - to be a woman after his own heart.

So, I am thankful for his sweet grace and forgiveness. I am thankful that he does not condemn us, but only exposes sin and things in us to set us free from bondage. I messed up today, I hurt someone I love. It kills me that I did this unintentioally - but I'm so thankful that I can ask for forgiveness, go to God who is quick to forgive, and learn all I can from the situation. I love my Jesus, and I try my best to follow him and do what is right - only to fall short of his glory. I pray that someday I will not fall into this -

I can't believe I'm here, in this place again, how did I manage to mess up one more time?
This pattern seems to be the story of my life, should have learned my lesson by the thousandth time.
Cause I've promiesd myself I wouldn't fall, but here I've fallen, I guess I'm not as strong as I thought, all I can do, is cry to you..

Oh God you have to save me, you're the last and only hope.
All my right answers fail me, I can't seem to make it on my own.

I always thought that I would be strong enough, what made all of them fall wouldn't take me down.
Did I think I was above it all? - I have learned that pride comes before the fall.

I can't promise myself won't fall, because here I have fallen - I know I'm not as strong as I thought, all I can do is cry to you...

Oh God, you have to save me, you're my last and only hope
All my right answers fail me, I can't seem to make it on my own.